A confession...

Ladies and gentlemen. A confession, if you please.

It grieves me, it galls me, it irks and appalls me, to admit to you that throughout 2009, I have been rather less than responsible with my debit card. Consider that for six months, I have made a consistent saving of £90 a month on my rent, compared with my previous house, and I have spent a good deal less time in the Alexandra Tavern in that period too (which also grieves, galls, irks and appalls me): logic would appear to dictate that I should have saved a not inconsiderable sum of wonga.

Yet there is a gap in this logic, a gap which (coincidentally) corresponds with the gap in my funds. A gaping gap, a gap which leaves me agape, aghast and tearing my hair out. A gap created by such acts of liveliness (and foolishness) as trips to London, St. Andrews, Nairn, Chelmsford, Southwold, Great Yarmouth, Sheringham, Worcester and London again (twice). In addition to learning to drive (a necessity), which wasn’t without expense, I also invested in Photoshop (a necessity) and a new iPod, to replace the one that was stolen in farcical circumstances in July. One or two gabbling sharks I know rage on about the necessity of this last purchase, but this is my argument: you try walking through Anglia Square twice daily or more, without the distraction of a cricket audiobook or Tom Waits...

In short, Lord only knows how much I have plundered into the economy this year, but what is starkly clear is that it must be curbed. My New Year’s resolution for 2010 is to be worth at least £5 by the beginning of the summer. This will necessitate severe cuts in visits to other cities for purposes of beverage consumption, a commitment not to fork out £650 on computer software, further promises to take care of my iPod this time, and to spend my time being productive with regards to my chosen career path. Your support at this difficult time is immeasurably appreciated…